Vacaciones are approaching!

I never know when I am going to be writing my blogs. I assumed at first that I would do them every Friday, but most Fridays I hang out with the family and then talk on Skype, and then I'm too tired to do anything. Saturday and Sunday are when I hang out with family, see the sites and do different things, making the weekend not a very ideal time to be writing a blog. Then school comes, and I get caught up in that and the after school activities... I always feel like, "Oh, I have to write my blog today." I blame it all on procrastination. Procrastination makes you (well, at least me) believe that everything I do, such as writing in this blog, is something that I don't enjoy. But I love writing in this blog... it just takes me a while to get around to doing it!

This week has been good, and has made me appreciate who I am and who I've been raised to be. It has been a week of discovering a little more about the Spanish lifestyle, and enjoying all that life has to bring.

I am normally a friendly person. I am normally that person that welcomes the new kid, or goes and says hello to someone that I don't know. I am normally a person that says "Hello!" really enthusiastically. I am normally a passionate person, and that is shown through my personality. Since I have been in Spain, I have found it extremely difficult to be that person. I have been shy. I have said, "Hola." instead of "Hola!" I thought I would come on exchange being the same enthusiastic person I am in Australia, and instead all I can think of is making a nice impression on people. It is hard to communicate who you are to a different culture, in a different language. I have really struggled with this, and this week have really let go of the shyness. I was talking to Adjowa, this week, about this subject, and how we have both felt so frustrated about letting the thoughts of others dictate how we act and react. We are who we are. I am proud of who I am, and where I've come from. Dad sent me an email also about this, and particularly about a change of character in general, and it came just at the right moment.

"You haven't left you behind... You will always be the same "me" (you) but different. Different because you are happy to learn and learning brings understanding. Understanding brings confidence. Confidence brings wisdom. Wisdom brings compassion. Compassion brings life. Life brings more life...You already are the person you want to be but haven't yet embraced all that you want to do, that God has prepared for you or the challenges that lie ahead... But you will always be you. That never gets left behind and the you that you are is somebody I love dearly and will always love to the depths of my heart, and to Pluto and back!!

So as you continue, that same you continues on your incredible journey be grateful for all that you have, the opportunities that come to you, the people you get to meet and the incredible lovely you, you are."

I have felt myself embracing what Dad's email says; that I am me, but I will learn and grow, and from that, grow into the person that God has set before me. And with this mindset, I have been letting go of what people think and allowing myself to be who I am. I know that my class has noticed this, and we have started chatting more, and I've started to get to know them more. It's not easy, but I keep putting myself out there by starting conversations. This week has been a great week, where I've opened up more to my class, joked around with them, they've joked back with me. Yesterday I did the 'I broke my nose!' (covering your nose with your hands and using your nail against your tooth to make a cracking sound) and they all fell for it and for ages were like OH MY GOODNESS! And then today, they did one right back at me. I felt like the biggest idiot at how gullible I was, but laughed along with them. I am enjoying my class more and more, and am starting to feel like I am part of the class. Part of being in a class is participating in the class, which is what I did last Thursday. Thursday was a joke of a day. Spanish schooling is extremely different to Australian school, and it has made me appreciate the schooling, and the education I've had. Spain is yet to understand the concept of substitute teachers. I am the newest and biggest fan of substitute teachers. Without substitute teachers, Australian education would be like Spanish education, where, if there is no teacher, there is no class. This is trivial and fun for any new exchanger in a new, exciting, different school (and country). You go to the library, smiling to yourself, because there is no class. I have been in Spain over six weeks, and I now have compassion for the Spanish students. Those days without their teachers, are days wasted not learning. Our history teacher has been away for a whole week, so we've missed out on a whole weeks worth of lessons. I cannot believe the stress the Spanish education system puts on these kids, as they have to learn what they should learn in class, without a teacher, by themselves. Thursday, I only had two classes, P.E. and Lengua, as the teachers were away for every other class, except for Latín, where the class didn't turn up...? I didn't really understand why, but it meant no class. Sitting silently in a library, (which has about 100 books... literally... for 1300 students) is only fun or slightly stimulating for a short period of time; not four hours. We had Lengua last period, and we were meant to watch una pelicula (movie) but, the projector broke. This meant that they had no lesson, so everyone was chatting with the teacher about Abortion. I didn't know this at the time, as I couldn't understand what they were all saying, so I tuned out, only to tune back in when Adjowa said to the class, "Laura has something to say about Abortion." Adjowa and I had discussed the issue of abortion just the day before, and we shared our views on it and it was a really good discusion. Adjowa quickly filled me in saying that the whole class was all for abortion, and wouldn't think twice about getting one. I, on the other hand, have different views on abortion, so she wanted me to share this with the class. I didn't even know how to say abortion in Spanish, let alone explain my views on it, so translated through Raquel, a girl in my class.

I said that I would never have an abortion, and that I think people shouldn't have them, but said that I thought that they were inevitable in certain situations, like ectopic pregnancies. This immediately started a big debate, as it was a polar opposite to what the entire class thought. They asked me why I thought it was wrong, and I stated my reasons, which then started a debate about what stage of pregnancy a baby is actually alive for. Looking back, it was pretty hilarious, a mixture between Spanish and English, and my class acting out becoming pregnant to try and get their points across. It was pretty crazy, and at first I felt uncomfortable being so obviously apart and different from everyone else, but as I kept talking and we started discussing, I realised that it didn't matter if my views were different from theirs. It was a great wake up moment.

Apart from the fact that I only had two classes on Thursday, and I really didn't enjoy the library times, I absolutely loved the day. It was the last day of school for the week, as it was Fathers Day on the Friday, so we had un puente (long weekend). And spring was in the air.

"The walk home was glorious, A perfect spring day, that made me smile as I walked home in the sun, with a crisp breeze cooling me down. Listening to music when I walk takes me to another place, and I am able to experience my town on a whole new level. I walked around town, listening to my Ipod, with the overwhelming sense to dance. These days are why I chose to go on exchange. They make me feel so alive, like... completely different to anything else I've ever experienced.

I sat on a bench in the park just marveling at teh beauty of Tudela. Even though it has its ugly parts about it, I look at the town with love. I am biased towards it, and I think to myself, 'who could ever not think that Tudela is the most beautiful town in Spain?' And as I say this I realise it is because of the memories I have of that path, where I chatted with Ana about my day, and that shop where I bought that lolly from. As I think about these memories, and 'my Tudela' I realise that Tudela has taken a little piece of my heart, which makes me wonder how broken I'll feel in 10 months time when I have to leave. I sat down on teh park bench and watched the sun slowly set over the cathedral, then over the bridge, finally sinking below the buildings. I sat there in awe.

How blessed to be able to experience this. I make sure I stop everyday to look at the view on the bridge over the train station on the way to school, because I don't want to become complacent. I want everyday to be like today. A day where I thank God from the bottom of my heart for this opportunity he has given me. I don't want to become complacent, because that will mean I will become bored, or unpassioned. I want to live life to the fullest, like Dave Roey, and his 'Princess'. When there are challenges, I want to look at them with a smile and the knowledge that God has my back. 'I want to do anything, I want to try everything... I'll be SHIRLEY THE BRAVE! Instead of saying 'I've only got 10 months left of my exchange,' I'll say, 'Laura, you've got 10 long months to go. Isn't that marvelous!'"

On Friday I got the opportunity to go skiing, in France again. We were meant to go for the Friday, Saturday and the Sunday, but unfortunately the weather was atrocious. We got the snow at about 11:30 am, a two hour trip from Tudela. I was so surprised, I felt like I had gone to a different place, with all the lack of snow. Unfortunately, I didn't take a photo, as I thought we would be coming back on Saturday and Sunday, and hadn't been bothered to take my camera out of the car. But there was hardly any snow, and the snow that was there was pretty slushy. It wasn't the best skiing conditions, but I was at the snow! In France! I couldn't have been happier. After lunch, we went skiing again, but the weather had taken a turn for the worse. It had started to rain, meaning that we could barely see where we were going when we were skiing, and the wind picked up. The wind was so fierce, that I was scared when I was on the ski lifts. It was painful being on the ski lifts as well, and had to cover my fave with my hands because of it. The skiing was no longer even enjoyable. After a couple of runs, we were on the lifts again, and it stopped for two minutes. Two. whole. minutes. Two minutes is a lifetime when you're swinging crazily in the air, on a ski lift, hanging by the smallest piece of metal, 20 metres above the ground, covering your face because otherwise you'd be in pain. I realised that I felt unsafe, and I wasn't enjoying myself. I told María that I wasn't going to go up after we had this run, and she agreed. By the time we got to the bottom, the lifts had shut anyway.

On Saturday, I went to Zaragoza, a city of 700, 000 people, about 45 minutes away from where I live in Tudela. We went to a family lunch. It was extremely unusual for me, as one side of the family, José Antonio's side consists of 11 people in total, including me and my host family, and María Antonia's side of the family consists of my host family, her parents, and her sister. So family get togethers are small. It was so unusual to hear quietness. I am used to joking, laughing, kids chatting away, music, T.V., singstar etc... It just emphasised the difference between Spain and Australia. But I have to say, it made me miss my extended family, and the wonderful people they all are.

After lunch, we went to the centre of Zaragoza, which was absolutely stunning. Again, I forgot my camera, but I am going there again next week, so I will take some photos then, and post them. Catholicism is the main religion in Spain, and I think about 75% of Spanish people would call themselves Catholic. The Catholicism is a huge part of their culture in Spain, so it is part of their cities, their architecture, their way of life. It is interesting to see the religion placed in all aspects of the Spanish culture, and I enjoyed seeing this being played out in Zaragoza. Zaragoza is home to la Basilica del Pilar, which is the patron saint for all Spanish people around the world. This Basilica is extremely important, and insanely famous and well-known. I went inside, and was blown away. It was like any art students dream come true.

"I saw a Goya. An actual Goya! In Spain! How incredible is that! I have to admit that art stirs something in me. It is something on a completely different level. It's visual; it draws me in, evokes emotions, tells a story in a different way to words. I can't describe the way art makes me feel. I can't define art and teh way I feel connected to it. But to see Goya, in the flesh, to see the paint strokes up close, to see the history, the passion, the intense emotions brought out in the way he painted stirred something deep within me. I felt incredibly privileged that I, Laura Elaine Konemann was able to experience, just for a moment a part of art histroy, a part of history. It was incredible when I stared at it with awe, my breath had been taken away, and Ana looked at me incredulously and just shrugged her shoulders and said, "We see Goya paintings all the time. Nothing new. Nothing special." I didn't know whether to be jealous or sad for her. Jealous that she was mere inches of glass away from breathtaking masterpieces, or sad that she didn't find them to be amazing anymore."

I loved going to Zaragoza. Today is Tuesday. Tomorrow I go to Madrid for four days. Last night I was awake until 3:15 am (well, that's when I last checked the time) just thinking about all of the opportunities that God has placed before me. I cannot wait to experience them all, and see what else is in store for me this year.

"Exchange is an incredible experience where I've been able to learn in immeasurable ways. I am filled with joy when I realise that I've learnt a new word, or when I understand a part of the character of God, or I learn something new about myself. This journey, this exchange, is allowing me to go on a journey of discovery, and I'm so pleased to be on it."

Winter has returned...

I don't want to apologise for not writing again last week, because my excuse is that I got caught up in life, enjoying the Spanish culture and all that Spain has to offer... I don't think that is something to be sorry about. It is my only hope, that as these weeks turn into months, I will become more and more busy becoming a little Spaniard. But nonetheless, I have so much to say that I wish I had written last week, and let you all know what's been happening in my life these past two weeks.

What a couple of weeks it has been. Not that anything remarkable, or life changing has happened, but small things that make me realise that I am in Spain, and that there will be both good times and bad. Exchange has been crazy, and so completely different than I or anyone else could have imagined it. Last week, I had credit card fraud. My money from my bank account was stolen, leaving me with $50 in the bank. Credit card fraud isn't extremely pleasant at any time, but it's especially not nice when you're on the other side of the world from your support system, without knowing what to do. It was one of those moments where I just wanted to hand everything over to Mum and Dad and let them deal with everything. I sent them an email about what to do, but had to call the bank to get everything sorted out. Mum and Dad helped lots, and I am forever thankful that they didn't really mind waking up at 2am in the morning to help me sort it out! I felt a little like I had been pushed into the deep end, without a lifesaver. I had to try and explain what had happened to my host family, which took a while cause we didn't understand each other at first. María Antonia thought that I had had $50 stolen, telling me to be careful next time... but after we communicated to each other that I only had $50 left in the bank it became much clearer. It doesn't feel like too much of a big deal writing about it now, but I remember feeling overwhelmed by everything at that moment. But it was a great learning curve for me, as I had an important issue that needed to be talked about, and gave me an opportunity to improve my Spanish. Not everything has been resolved from the fraud, as I haven't got my money back yet, but I am hoping that it'll be returned!

These past two weeks have been the weeks where I have felt like I have finally settled in. I am starting to get into the rhythm of life, and have started to feel like, and have accepted that Tudela is my home for the next year. It has been an incredibly exciting, fun, draining, tedious and wonderful experience to have things start to feel like home. I have started to have a routine. I now know that if I walk up the stairs to cross the bridge over the train station in the morning before the old beret-wearing grandfather taking his grandson (I'm assuming) to school, then I am on time. If they are infront of me, then I am running late. I know that I'll pass the courtyard near my house on the way to school at 8:37 every morning. I know that I'll pass the courtyard before school at 8:44 and I can walk slowly and relax a little. I know how long it will take me to get to la biblioteca y el conservatorio (the library and the music conservatory) and when I need to rush or relax. I know that on Monday, I'll pass that lady who walks her Siberian Husky. La camerera (The waitress) at the coffee shop I go to everyday knows exactly what I want, and I don't need to ask anymore. I have noticed the routine in other people's lives, which only emphasises to me, the fact that I now have a routine. This thought alone is invigorating, and a little crazy to comprehend. I am looking forward to when I know Tudela like the back of my hand, and I can't wait for the day when it will become my 'second home'.

Last Wednesday I got the opportunity to go to Madrid for the day!! I had to go to re-apply for my extended Visa. I was so excited, and I couldn't wait to see the other exchange students to see what they have been up to this past month. We have all Facebooked each other, but it's not the same as face-to-face contact. I wasn't sure as to how I was going to be getting to Madrid, as JYC (Juventud y Cultura, [Youth and Culture] - my Spanish exchange program) hadn't organised anything. After writing to them, they finally (In Spanish time!) replied and let me know that they were paying for my ticket, and that I'd be going by train. I was really happy, because it cut my travelling time down by 4 hours (2 extra hours there, 2 extra hours back by bus.) Winter has temporarily returned to Tudela, with really extreme winds, and it has been absolutely freezing. I will be wearing lots of layers, all rugged up, but the wind just passes straight through them, making me feel like ice. I had been told that Madrid was even colder, so I left to walk to the station with too many layers on to count. I started to walk and as I was listening to my Ipod, my fingers started to lose their feelings. Regardless of my loss of feeling, I was in total bliss. I felt so blessed to be able to be walking to the train station in such a beautiful town, looking at the white sky and feeling... at home.... when it started to snow. On the outside I was calm and poised; on the inside I was a giddy five year old, jumping up and down. I got to the train station with 15 minutes to spare, and had the choice of waiting inside for the train, or waiting outside with the snow. I chose the snow. It was so beautiful, with the wind picking up the snow and making beautiful patterns, each of the snowflakes doing their own dance. I noticed that I had started walking in circles, walking in beat to my music, bopping about, a goofy grin plastered to my face, with the Spaniards looking out at me from the heated waiting room at the crazy girl who was dancing with the snow. This is why I love exchange. This is why I love Spain. I get to experience small but amazingly big things. These small but big things will be the things that I remember when I'm 84 with no teeth telling my great-grandchildren about that time I went to Madrid.

The train ended up being half an hour late. The trip down was stunning, with the landscape changing by the minute.

From mountainous (you can't really tell from the photo, but it was!)

To desert. I know that it doesn't really look like there is much difference, but it was staggering. So beautiful.

It was great to see the other exchange students. I felt quite nervous though, I'm not sure what about... maybe about my language skills, if what I had been experiencing had been the same as the others... but as soon as I saw them, that nervousness faded away, It was so good to see them, and lo and behold... we have been experiencing the exact same things. I was really impressed by everyones Spanish and was so glad that their Spanish had come so far when they hadn't known any to begin with. Most of them (I think!) are taking Spanish for foreigners classes and I think I may look into that, cause it's obviously working immensely for them. We got the Visas done, without any pain and talked to each other at every possible moment about how everything was going... comparing daily routine, food, family, friends, experiences. It was so nice to see people who were experiencing what I have been experiencing, at the exact same time. It was extremely reassuring that the struggles I have had were the same that they were experiencing. We had lunch together, and we ordered a salad. (YES!!) All of us have been feeling quite sad about the lack of fresh vegetables and salad that Spaniards eat. It was nice to share a moment of, "Oh my goodness, if I don't eat some salad soon I might die" together, and then eat a salad and sigh at the loveliness and un-oily-ness of it. We were on our own then, and decided to have a Starbucks coffee. We all ordered our coffee, and I was astounded by how normal it felt to be ordering in Spanish. It made me realise how far my Spanish has come, and how I am confident enough to do everyday things like order coffee. Ordering coffee may not seem a big thing, but to do it with ease, and no fear of getting things wrong makes me feel on top of the world. These are the moments that make exchange. I feel like most of my accomplishments that I feel, are ones that seem so small and insignificant. I guess that there will be many small and insignificant moments that I will remember forever.

There is nothing like sharing a cup of coffee with a group of girls. And these girls, (L>R: Rachael, Me, Pascale, Vic and Bianca) are girls I know that will be very close to my heart at the end of this year. We all share a special bond and cannot wait to get to know them more and more.

I love Madrid. It is so beautiful. Although I have only been there twice, and for such a short amount of time for both of those times, I know that Madrid is one of my favourite cities in the world. I look at Madrid with a little bit of possessiveness. I look at it, and I feel myself whisper to myself, "Mine." Because, for a year, Madrid is mine. It is mine to explore, to look at, to become a part of. Because this year is all about me being in Spain, discovering Spain, becoming Spanish. I feel like everytime I have come to Madrid it has taken a little piece of my heart. The architecture is amazing. The atmosphere is inviting, like a hot cup of coffee on a cold winters day. The people's Spanish nature is infectious. Everyday I find myself falling a little more in love with Spain and it's culture.

I have found myself liking different things than when I first arrived in Spain. I like a little bit of olive oil on things now. When I first arrived, I thought it was weird, and I thought to myself, "Why did I come to a country with such weird food!" I am becoming a Spaniard by picking the bones from my fish, occassionally chewing the fish from the bone. I now use washing up gloves, when before, in Australia I despised them. In Australia I never used a bath mat, thinking they were the most stupid invention in the world, and I secretly had a thing against people that used them. Here in Spain, we use them. I have gotten so used to the bath mat, that, the other day, when the bath mat wasn't in the bathroom, I freaked out, thinking to myself, "How am I supposed to get out of the shower! I can't get out of the shower without my bath mat!" Before carefully getting my hand towel from its rack and placing it on the ground as a substitute bath mat. In Australia, I did not like licorice. In fact, I really didn't like it. I wouldn't ever eat it. But here, in Spain, I love it. I'm not sure if it's because it's differently made, or if it's because I miss my Dad so much and I know that he likes licorice. I am astounded at the things that have changed. But, I'm enjoying and embracing this type of change.

There has been some things that I worry about, particularly with change. I have been challenged immensely while I've been in Spain by the different personalities I have seen while I've been here. I feel like a lot of the time, I don't really fit in here. I mean, I do in some sort of way, but I'm different. I am yet to meet a Christian in Spain. That's been so difficult for me. People expect particular things out of people, or expect people to behave in a way that I don't really want to be like. I don't see the point in getting drunk every weekend, or doing stuff that is not good for my body or good for me emotionally. I am still new here, in Spain, and I haven't yet made a real Spanish friend. Yes, I have friends, and I chat with them, and I would call them my friend... but it's difficult to have a friend that you connect with on a deeper level when you don't share the same language. I know that a lot of exchangers struggle with this, and it is a challenge, as I want to fit in, become friends with everyone, without giving up who I am, and what I believe.

"I don't want to sacrifice myself, who I am to have people accept me. I don't wante to give up who I am, who God made me to be to fit into what people expect of me. I am different to a lot of people. (General group of people... not everyone!) I haven't met a single Christian while I've been here, and that has been difficult. There have been times when they've (This they I'm talking about is about a particular group, not about the whole of Spain or my whole class etc...) bagged out Christianity, and I've just wanted to run. But, I haven't. I've told them what I believe. They have a moment where they stare at me in embarrassment of what they've just said, and then I smile and it's all ok. And I think they respect me more because of that. I haven't shied away from who I am, and what they've said. Sure, I'm still different. I'm not Spanish right now. I am Laura, the Australian. I want to adapt and become a culture Spaniard, but I will never be the person who will give themselves up for the ways of the world. It may be a more difficult road, but I've heard, (and studied... :|) that 'the road less taken...' has '...made all the difference'"

That being said, I really like my classmates, and I don't always feel like I am completely different from them. They really do go out of their way to approach me and be friendly to me, and I'm beginning to see through my first judgments of them, and see the real person behind the clothes and hair and appearances. I just tried uploading a class photo of my class, but it didn't work. So, I shall tell you about them in text, and hopefully will get the photo up another day. Starting from the top left of the photo:

Gonzalo. I sit next to him in most of my classes, and is probably the nicest person in the world. He is always going out of his way to make me comfortable, or making sure I understand everything. His mum is a kindergarten teacher, so he brings me in books in Spanish and gets me to read them to improve my Spanish. He is really nice. He is also 18. Most of the kids in the class are 16, which I struggle with, as soon I'll be 19, and they'll still be 16, or 17. A two or three year age gap.

Carlos. I don't really know anything about him. I haven't ever talked to him, but he seems nice enough.

Luis. Luis is also 18. He is a giant, (compared to me anyway.) and is really lovely. He is always late to class, (it seems) but noone seems to mind. I think he has the goofiest smile and has a big laugh. But, also has a shy side to him.

David. Hilarious. I love him. I kept wondering why he kept on changing clothes for while, as I'd see him in some classes with one jacket on, another class with a different jacket. Turns out he has a twin brother, that's in geography with me. Oops. Loveliest guy, and is my little badminton partner. He reminds me of Scotty, with all the energy he has.

Raquel. Raquel is really nice. She is an amazing artist. In Latín I sit next to her, and just stare in awe at the talent she has.

Sabier. He cracks me up. I assume he has the humour of Arby, and is extremely stubborn. When he gets into a debate, he gets extremely fired up. VERDE ES VERDE! Filosofía brings fun memories of him and the teacher arguing.

Tamara is gorgeous. Absolutely beautiful. And nice :)

Pablo. Pablo's a ranga. And funny. And nice. I like him.

Andrea. Andrea reminds me of Jess Taylor. I think you guys would be friends. I quite like her too.

Aritz. He reminds me of Nick Davidson. Has a unique laugh, but I don't really know anything about him. He's nice too.

Rosa. Rosa is gorgeous. I don't really know much about her, but everyone really likes her, so I'm assuming she's really nice!

Javier. He is pretty much the Spanish version of Joel. But more... Joelish. It's like having 100 Joels in the room. I like him :)

Nora. Nora is Madi Weston. But Spanish. So cute, and adorable and shorter than me. She is so unbelievably nice and wonderful. And she seems to be small enough to fit in my baggage to take back home. She is really really, lovely. I really like her.

Sofia. Sofia sits infront of me, and although we haven't talked much, she's really lovely. She is going out with Gonzalo, and they've been together for a year and a bit. They're really cute together, and she has a nice smile.

Marta. Marta sits next to Sofia, and is really good friends with her and Gonzalo. She is really nice, and absolutely gorgeous. I love her hair.

Adjowa. Adjowa is the other exchange student, and I've already talked about her in previous blog entries. She's really nice, and has helped out heaps with my first few weeks of exchange and getting settled in.

Naiara. I love this girl. She is really funny, has the funniest laugh ever, and is really accomodating. She and Luis sit behind me and Gonzalo and we get to chat a bit. She's really cute :)

And that's my class. I quite like them :)

Sorry that my blog has been so disjointed, I have been writing it all weekend. I thought that I would share another little bit from my journal.

"I'm currently sitting at the table outside of the coffee shop at the tennis, and I'm quite cold as teh wind has a bite to it. It it's nice nonetheless. I love where I'm living - it's so beautiful. I feel so blessed to be here, but I do feel a little jealous of the exchangers living in Madrid. They're all so central to everyone and everything. But I know I shouldn't dwell on that. I should dwell on the face that I am close to my town and can walk everywhere, whereas they cannot. I should see that I have been able to go to Madrid, and will be able to do that again and again. I have people like Joc, who seem to call at the right time and offer such a sense of comfort when I'm feeling down. I've gone to France. I am wiht a family who genuinely care fore me. I am with a family who will allow me to experience many different things. I am able to get an exchange experience that I know will be an excellent success. There are many things that I struggle with on exchnage. There are things that I love. there are things that will frustrate me or make me feel like a failure. But I know. I know with every essence of my body, that going on exchange is the right thing me for to do. I might get frustrated beyond belief or want to give up, but like they say:
"Exchange...they never said it would be easy, just that it would be worth it."

It's now Sunday night, past my bedtime and I thought I'd leave you with a book I just read Javier. It is a book called Lotsa de Casha by Madonna. Here is the blurb. "Lotsa de Casha was by far the richest man in teh country. He had everything that money could buy, but no matter how much money Lotsa made, he wasn't happy. No matter how many grand castles, fast horses or fancy carriages he bough, he was still a gloomy old sourpuss. Find out how Lotsa not only discovered the secret to happiness, but also found a friend."

I think this has got to be my new favourite book. It was filled with different facts, which added to the story, but I think also said a lot about how to live life. I was greatly encouraged by the words, and encourage you to read the book. I'll leave you with some of the quotes.

"Fact number 1: Just because something's expensive doesn't mean it's worth it."

"Fact number 2: Unhappy people like it when everyone else is unhappy."

"Fact number 3: The secret to happiness is this: if you share what you have and ut others before you, you will find happiness."

"Fact number 4: Unhappy people always attract more unhappiness."

"Fact number 5: Smiling is contagious."

"Fact number 6: When you learn to share, oyu will not only find happiness. You will also find a friend."

"Lotsa de Casha had never worked so hard in his life. He had never seen so many people smile. He was starting to feel good about himself.... he thought about how nice everyone had been. He realised that he hadn't thought about how much money he had for over a week. He realised he was happy."

In what ways are we able to share today?

One month...

This will be a very short post (as it's midnight and I just finished watching a movie with the family and I'm exhausted) to say that I made it to my one month anniversary!!

How incredible, and how crazy? I can't believe that I have been in Spain for a whole month. I feel like I'm still the 'newbie', still finding my footing in this crazy place called Spain; yet at the same time, I feel like I have been here forever. I had a bout of homesickness today. It was a bittersweet day, as I felt so excited that I had made it to the one month mark, but then realised that I still had 11 more to go. Not to say that I don't want to have them, because believe me, I can't wait for these next 11 months. I am no where near ready to come home yet. But it's been a month since I've hugged Mum, talked with Dad (face to face), cuddled Bonnie, hung out with my siblings, watched movies with Ape and Min, laughed with Tarn, had coffees with Jo and Pip, played with Ellyn, enjoyed spending time with my relatives. All the people that are most important to me are in Australia, and today, I felt incredibly sad that I wasn't there with them. I am constantly missing home, but I know it's not forever. I can acknowledge that I miss home, but not get sad about it. Today I was sad. A month is a long time without the comfort of familiarity.

I sent an email to Mum and Dad saying so, and as soon as I pressed send, I went out to Tudela with María and Ana and had the time of my life, making me extremely happy to be in Spain. I acknowledged that I missed home, but was no longer sad about it. I felt like that was a huge reason to celebrate... to know when you're homesick, but approach it in a way to combat that feeling of sadness.

Prayer is, of course, essential in this. Where would I be without prayer and God? I know I probably say this in every post, but it's so true, and such an important part in my exchange and how it plays out: God is a constant in my life. Everything changes except him. Jas (my sister-in-law) sent me an email today, and it was just what I needed. (I hope you don't mind me showing this little bit Jas!)

"It says in Hebrews 4:16 Let us then approach God's throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need.
So enter his throne room and sit at his feet, let him refresh you and bring you peace, strength, comfort, hope, health, joy, forgiveness, passion, energy, restoration and most of all bask in his love for you!"

It was what I needed to read, and I felt like it was such a God moment.

Anyway I'm exhausted so I'll post again tomorrow and let you know how my week has been! Love to all x x

Rinse and Repeat.

Three weeks in. Almost a month. 49 weeks left.

I feel like I have been away from home a week rather than three weeks. Everyday I am here, in Tudela, Spain, I feel a little more at home. Everyday I am able to understand just what a year away from home looks like. Everyday I fall a little more in love with Spain. Everyday I discover a new, exciting secret of Spain. I feel like I am on my own treasure hunt, (or geocaching adventure!) and everyday I get a new piece of treasure. But like a real adventure, it's not always smooth sailing, and I am often confronted with obstacles - mainly my frustration at situations and cultural differences. But, like every true hero in these stories, I brandish my sword, fight the villains and live to tell the tale.

With these exciting moments, comes the reality of normal life. I am living a normal life, but in a foreign country, and communicating in a foreign language. I am three weeks into my exchange, and have finally settled into a routine. Everyday is more or less the same, and I feel like I am starting to live a 'normal' life. My week as follows:

Everyday I wake up at 7:30, have a shower, get ready for school. At 8am I go upstairs and either set the table for breakfast, or start eating, as it's already been set. Every meal in Spain is a three course meal, so for breakfast for el primero plato I eat fruit; normally orange, kiwi and apple. (Sometimes pear as well!) For el segundo plato, I eat a bowl of porridge, with Cola Cao, a milo like chocolate powder. The Cola Cao goes into the porridge, essentially making it a warm subsitute for Coco-Pops. Today, my family bought a 25kg bag of the oats, as we eat so much porridge every morning! For el tercero plato I eat a piece of toast, covered in olive oil. I love the bread in Spain so much. I have yet to see a loaf of bread, as we only eat homemade bread, or french-baguette-type bread. Breakfast is usually from 8 until 8:15, (but for Ana, María y Javier it's until about 8:30ish) and then I unload the dishwasher and stack it again, before rushing downstairs to brush my teeth, and head out the door to walk to school at 8:30.

There is nothing like walking to school. It is something that I have always dreamed of being able to do, and now I get to do it everyday. I love walking with the morning air, music setting the pace of my walking, and watching people take their dogs for walks. (Oh Bonnie, how I miss you!) I don't think I will ever get tired of it. School starts at 9am, and I have six classes a day. I have P.E. twice a week, which I love, as it is all prac and no theory. This week we had a volleyball exam, and I went quite terribly. They have been doing volleyball for a while, and it was my second week, after two years of no P.E. ... The P.E. teacher had to stop the exam to try and teach me how to do the shots and serves and things properly. Haha! But I loved it nonetheless. I love not driving, and walking everywhere. P.E. is great, because I am able to connect with the students on a different level, as there isn't much language involved.

School is a mixture between excitement, incredible interest, being overwhelmed, and extreme boredom. I am normally excited when I understand something like exam dates, or dates in general. Understanding something a teacher is saying in Spanish is extremely rewarding, and makes all the crappy aspects of exchange worth it. For words, phrases and expressions to click is like eating chocolate after not eating it for a while. It is like taking the training wheels off a bike, like winning a grand final. It is something so small, yet something so big, and every time I understand something, I feel like I need to jump up, tell everyone, have them pat me on the back, make me a cake and say congratulations.
With this understanding comes incredible interest. I start to pay attention to the teacher more, put every ounce of concentration I can muster in trying to understand what they are saying. If there are worksheets, then I will try and translate them. Something that has me excited, and interested is history. We are currently studying the Russian Revolution in history. I have always wanted to study modern history at school, and when I had the chance to, I had to choose between it and Spanish. Spanish won out. I was so disappointed. But now, because I have studied Spanish, I am in Spain getting the opportunity to learn what I have wanted to learn. Isn't God amazing by giving us opportunities like mine? I am continually amazed by what I am learning... about myself, God and school subjects.
On the other hand, if I don't understand what the teacher is saying (most of the time) I can feel overwhelmed. I feel overwhelmed by how little I understand, by what I am not learning, and with this comes boredom.

I took some photos of what I do in class...These books have been my lifesavers. I look mainly at the grammar, and learn lots, particularly in Latín class.

The class mainly does all of their work in their textbooks. I don't have any textbooks, and I wouldn't buy them, because it would cost me about 300 euros. So, when they do their work (written work), I write letters :).

English is a great class, as I can help people with their English, and they can help me with my Spanish. They do the exercises in English, and I translate them into Spanish. This is a worksheet of English words, and my friend Gonzalo translated the words into Spanish for me.

I try and read the handouts given to me. This one is about the Russian Revolution. As you can see, there are lots of words that I don't understand, and my sheets are full of English words and phrases to help me understand what the sheet actually says. But it is an extremely rewarding experience to be able to understand quotes from Lenin and Trotsky!

There are many times when I get bored. Completely and utterly bored. So I fill pages of my notebooks with scribbles that look like this.
I draw things, and then label them in Spanish. I now know all about the insides and outsides of houses!

I love Smiggle. A) Because the pens smell lovely and B) Because I now have different coloured pens to create colourful squiggly things with.

I normally get a lift home from school with Ana's friend, and at around 3:05 I get home and have lunch. Lunch is another three course meal, starting normally with soup, or rice or potato or something like that. The second dish is normally a piece of fish, ending with fruit or yoghurt. It's really unusual having the dishes seperately, as I'd normally have it on the same plate in Australia. This has been something that's taken a while to get used to!

After lunch I normally read, watch the Olympics, and study (translate). Most nights, (6-9pm) the kids have activities, so I take them to those - music and painting, and walk around town and have a coffee. Dad, I have found my own little Cafe Cee. It's this cute little cafetería, and the coffees are only 1,20 euros. I have had some really nice (broken) chats with the lady that owns the store. She originally thought I came from France, and that Australians spoke French. But after a bit we understood each other. She sat opposite me, as no one else was in the store, smoking her cigarette, while I drank my coffee and read my book. I thought it was nice. In Spain you can smoke pretty much everywhere. I see kids every morning smoking outside school, people smoking in cafeterías, in bars... you're allowed to smoke pretty much everywhere. My clothes smell of smoke. The attitude towards smoking is completely different here in Spain then at home.

Dinner is normally between 9-10pm, and can take up to 1 hr 30 mins to eat. Eating here is a family event, and we all eat together. Dinner is the same as lunch normally. It's so frustrating. Words just don't match up to the experiences I've had in Spain. There's only so much I can say, and often I can't put what I want to say into substantial words.

Spain is great. I am having the time of my life. But I'm still living a normal life. When I talk to people from back home, everyone wants to know how it is going. Words can't describe all that I'm feeling, all that I'm experiencing... but on a very basic level, I'm living my life normally, just in a different country.

"As usual I have such a large amount of emotions running through me. I didn't know that I had the capacity to be feeling so many conflicting emotions at one time. It's a constant tug-of-war, which emotion will win? Which will be pushed into the corner waiting to come out and attack me when I least expect it? How can I sum up my experiences of exchange into one small diary, into words that cannot compare to the sights, sounds, tastes that I get to experience on a daily basis? How can I explan the warm joy I feel bubbling inside me when I explain something correctly, or understand something in Spanish? How can I show you just how similar people are to my friends and family back home? How can I describe to you, my diary, the smell - that burning, intensely sweet smell of the lolly shop, competing with the familiar delicious aroma of coffee and newly back bread in the plaza that walk past everyday? How can I describe my utter frustration when boys pull other peoples' hair, when I've told them in both Spanish and English to stop? I bought you, this diary as my substitute of my mum, dad, Min, Ape, Tarn, my friends, family, who I share my life with. I bought you so I could come home everyday and share everything with someone, something. But I come and sit and... nothing. I can't seem to express all of these emotions I'm feeling in words. There aren't enough words to describe my life right now.

Spain is like a Kandinsky painting... a blur, a myriad of colours. Different beautiful colours and shapes all mixed together to make a beautiful, wonderful, tasty picture. How can you describe such a painting well enough so that the other person can imagine each line, stroke, colour?
In that same way, how can I effectively describe my experiences in Spain?

My life is a never ending ride. It is exciting, beyond imaginable and at the same time; normal. I go to school, come home, hang out with the family - rinse and repeat. My life is no different... except that it's completely different.

Exchange is confusing.
Exhilarating.
Tiring.
Wonderous.
Amazing.
Frustrating.
A ride I will never forget."

I'm sorry if my words do not present an accurate picture of my life over here in Spain. I have so many memories already, that I never want to forget, but when I look at what I have written, I feel like nothing I write could ever compare to the real thing. The real emotions, colours, tastes, sights.

I still haven't found a church. But, then again, I haven't really looked. I feel like, as much as I am growing in my relationship with God, I'm neglecting Him just as much. I miss church. I want fellowship. I want to worship with others. I want to learn. I want to be surrounded by people who believe like I do. People who have a hope and a trust in the God that has promised us an eternal life. The God that cares for me. The God that provides for me. The God that has blessed me with this opportunity of exchange.
I am so often frustrated by things, that I refuse to see God's hand in it. If anything goes wrong, it's him I blame first. I need to look for him in everything that happens, whether it be good or bad. I need to acknowledge God for who he is - the author of my life. I tell myself to be the clay and let God be the sculptor, but I am so stubborn. I often try to mold myself into something that God hasn't desired. I can't live this life on my own. I need God. And I need to surrender my exchange, this year, my life over to him completely. It seems so easy as I write it on this page, but I so often hold back. My hope for this year is that it is a year where I will continually surrender myself over to God and see what he has in store for me. I was listening to a Hillsong song earlier this evening, "I will exalt you" and it struck a chord with me:

"I will exalt you, I will exalt you, You are my God.
My hiding place, my safe refuge, my treasure Lord, you are.
My friend and King, Anointed one, Most Holy.
Because you're with me, I will not fear."

I am a lady in Spain...

Before I left for exchange, I promised myself that the first song I'd listen to in Spain, would be 'Lady in Spain' by Ingrid Michaelson... sure enough, it was the first song I listened to, with the first line saying, 'I am a lady in Spain'. And indeed, I am. I am a lady in Spain. I am a lady living in Spain.

Today is the two week mark of my exchange. I have officially completed 3.84615384% of my exchange. In my first two weeks of exchange, I've spent two days in the capital city of the country, Madrid, gone to school, settled into my home, gone to a traditional Spanish fiesta, dressed up in costume, gone skiing, gone to the Pyrenees and gone to France. (And tonight I even had a type of Paella... not really paella as it didn't have any meat... but if it had, it would have been!) I have felt incredibly blessed with all that I have been able to do in such a short amount of time!

Last weekend, we had a puente, which directly translates as bridge, but in this case means... long weekend! We had until Tuesday off school, it was the festival, Carnaval, that weekend. Carnaval is a big fiesta to mark the beginning of Lent, (40 days before Easter). It's probably the equivalent of the US Halloween, but 10x bigger. Everyone dresses up as a group; so I saw lots of groups all dressed identically. I, however, only found out that you had to dress up a couple of days beforehand, so I didn't have the time to go out and get what other people were wearing. Instead I wore black, bought a mask and became Catwoman. (Unfortunately I completely forgot to take a photo of myself dressed up!) At 7 o'clock on the Saturday night, everyone came to the town to watch the parade (normally every year, the parade is held in the Plaza Nueva, but it is currently being re-tiled... so it was in the second biggest area). There were hundreds of people, and the parade went on for about forty minutes. It was so amazing, but it was so cold, -2, which made it uncomfortable, especially in my costume of tights and a thermal top (but I was wearing a jacket, scarf and gloves)! The pictures below are of the parade. (Sorry for the massive pictures... I don't know how to make them smaller!)

There were so many different dances from different countries, it was quite cool.

These were giant... things... that danced as well. They were fun!

This was probably my favourite part of the parade. There were groups of people from South America, and the groups from Peru and Bolivia did their traditional dances in their traditional clothes. It was really great. The men all wore sneakers, but the shoes are part of the traditional dress for women, so they all wore sandals, and on close inspection, many were wearing the sandals without any stockings or anything... in -2 degree weather.

After the parade, I went and had dinner with Adjowa (the other Australian exchange student) and Chessie, and English Au Pair, and we had Chinese. My other Spanish friends had dinner at one of their houses together, but because I'm only new, and they barely knew me, I wasn't invited. The Chinese food was completely different to that in Australia, and I have to say that Australian Chinese is better! But it only cost 7 Euros for an entre, rice, meal and drink which was great. By the time we had finished dinner it was only 10pm. So I went back home, and was told to meet up with the other people at midnight, you know, because that's when Spanish people leave home for the night. I was so tired, and I was leaving for the snow at 8am the next morning. But, I went, and had fun. In Tudela there is a street called Tubo, which is full of bars that everyone hangs out at. I really like the Spanish culture. You greet everyone (outside of school) with dos besos (two kisses) - one on the right cheek, and then one of the left cheek. I think it's nice, and when I was greeted that way, I felt as if I had made friends. At one point in the night, I was walking to the restaurant in Tudela, when I heard someone yell out, "Laura?" I looked around to see a guy in a costume looking at me. I had no idea who it was, so I said, "Sí?" And he started walking up. When he got closer, I realised that it was Gonzalo, the guy I sit next to in class. I felt like jumping up and down because someone from my class had recognised me and gone out of their way to say hi. We greeted each other with dos besos and chatted for a bit. The small things like someone yelling out your name and stopping to say hello are the things that make being in Spain special. I stayed in Tubo until 2 in the morning, and fell into bed, exhausted.

I got up at 7 the next morning to get ready for skiing, as we were leaving at 8. At 8:30 my family still weren't up, so I waited... and waited... and waited... until around 10:40. Almost three hours after we were meant to leave. I then found out that the carreterra (the road) to the snow was closed, so we couldn't go skiing that day. I was so frustrated at the situation, as I could have slept for longer, and we didn't leave until around 4pm that day. I get stressed with things like this... when I get up early, and then don't leave until late. I don't really know why it stressed me out, as it didn't really matter that we didn't leave, because we couldn't ski anyway... but I just felt stressed, which in turn, made me homesick.


We stayed in a small town called Isaba, about 25 km south of the border of France. It was covered in snow (not that you can see in the photo) and was extremely beautiful. On the Sunday it was -6, during the night it was -18 and on Monday it was -12. I'm not sure how cold it was on Tuesday though. Probably around -6ish.

On Monday the road was still closed, so we went cross-country skiing instead (de fondo in Spanish). It was so much fun. I was so terrible at it, as I'd never done it before, and felt like I had no control over the skis as my heel wasn't connected to them. So my skiing was more like disjointed, clumsy walking. But definitely fun.

The road was open on Tuesday, so I got to go downhill skiing. Oh, my, the view to France was just stunning. The view while I skiied was stunning. I loved it so much. It was such a great day, and the skiing was fantastic... The last time I went skiing was in 2004, so a while back and I had been worried that I would have forgotten how to ski. But I didn't! I remembered it all straight away. Ahh, skiing is so much fun.

As you can see from this photo, the view was magnificent! I kept thinking "Just beautiful!" for you Mum :)

But as I wrote earlier, I was homesick. Everything I do and see reminds me of home in some way. And I felt ecstatic that I was seeing France, getting to ski, being able to see another part of Spain... but I felt a twinge of homesickness. This is a small excerpt from my diary:

"I keep asking myself, 'Laura, are you having fun?' and I don't know how to answer. Because as ecstatic I am that I am skiing, and as wonderful as my time in Spain has been, it's also been very surreal. I think it is only just sinking in that I am in Spain for a year. I. live. in. Spain. It's sinking in, but so is the fact that I am away from my family for a year. I'm starting to miss my home, and my family, Australian food. I thought this year would be so much easier than it's been. Not that I've had a hard time, but emotionally it's been hard. I think it's hit home that I'm missing out on a year of my parents' life. And that makes me really sad. So, I'm on holidays, skiing, I should be ecstatic - I am ecstatic, but underneath that there is a dull ache. I'm aching for a hug from Mum, and I'm aching for Dad's squinted smile. I've only been here one and a half weeks... how will I cope for a whole year?"

And this isn't to say that I'm having a hard time all the time. Oh no. I'm loving it here. Yes, exchange has its low points, but it also has its highs. Like, finding a Spanish friend, who doesn't speak a word of English (as most of the kids at my school speak English really well) and finding out that he has the same love for movies as me. To be able to connect with someone through something like movies, showing them imdb.com and them showing me the Spanish equivalent is amazing. To be able to try and succeed in explaining the Royal Easter Show and The Man From Snowy River is fun. To be able to see how my Spanish is improving every day, and see my confidence in my language skills growing is such a blessing. María Antonia told me a story today in Spanish, about a mouse who was with his children, when a cat started chasing them. The mice hid behind a chair and said, "woof woof!" and the cat ran away. He then turned to his children and said, "This is why it is important to learn different languages." Haha! I thought it was hilarious, and I loved that I understood it. I am understanding more and more, which I'm loving. I'm not speaking as much Spanish as I'd like to, which is a cause of frustration, but I believe that that will change, and no matter my circumstances, I will try my absolute best to speak Spanish.

Sorry if my posts are disjointed, as I am only going to write once a week, and it's hard to remember all of the things I want to say. I'm bursting with things to say right now, but can't express it in words that will make sense. I guess, all I can say, is that is exchange is more and less than what I expected. Every exchange student has told me, "Don't go to your country with expectations." I thought that I was the best exchange student, and that I had no expectations whatsoever. But everyone does, either consciously or subconsciously. In so many ways I have been challenged in the way that I view Spain. I have been right about so many things, and wrong about so many things. I have been surprised by the amount of bread Spanish people eat. I have fallen in love with Spanish bread. It is so delicious. I eat bread everyday, toasted with olive oil. I was surprised by the kindness of the students in my class. The first day they didn't really pay attention to me, but as they got to know me, they started saying 'hi' in the corridors, talking to me, making my timetable readable, translating things that I don't understand. I feel like I have discovered a Spain that I never knew about, and as the year goes on, I can't wait to discover more of the hidden truths about the country that I am living in. However, one thing I have been right about (at least with my host family), and I have struggled so much with, has been running late. You're on time if you're 10 minutes late to school. You're early if you get there at 9am. (When school starts.) I am someone, who in Australia, was occasionally late to things, by 5 or 10 minutes, but not all the time. If I needed to be somewhere, I would make sure I was there. I have been to school for 2 weeks now, and have been late everyday, which just absolutely. stresses. me. out. It's not a bad thing that my family are late; that is part of who they are, and the culture of Spain. But for me, (and one of my teachers) I have found it something really difficult to adjust to. I talked to my host mum, María Antonia, and told her how important it was that I was on time to my maths class, as the teacher has been annoyed at me for being late. So, today, we left earlier, and got to school at 9am. But by the time we got out of the car, rushed to the class, the door was already closed, and I had to knock to be let in. The teacher told me that if I was late again, I wouldn't be let into the classroom. I felt horrible. At that moment, I was thinking, "Oh my goodness, what am I doing in Spain?" I've been here two weeks, and already a teacher doesn't like me. These cultural differences are challenging to me, and I know that it will take time for me to properly adjust to them. Maybe when I get back home I will always be late, or perhaps I will always arrive 5 minutes early!

One constant through my time in Spain has been God. I wrote in my diary today:

"I feel like all of these things are happening, and it all just means that I need to learn to rely on God all the more. I don't have Mum and Dad and my friends to talk, celebrate and cry to all the time, I have God. He is with me always. And he will never forsake me."

I feel like this exchange, if for nothing else, is going to be a year of yearning to know more about God and searching to find what His plan for me is. Brad sent me a bible passage the other week, which I found really powerful. This little bit is 2 Corinthians 4:8,16-18:

"We are hard pressed on every side but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down but not destroyed... Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen, since what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal."

Happy Birthday Min!!

Today (well, tomorrow for me) is my best friend Min's birthday.

Happy Birthday Min!!

This is a picture of Min, Myself, and April. We are best friends. I miss them a lot over here in Spain. We started to become really close friends at the beginning of year 11, and I have loved becoming a part of these beautiful girls' lives. I feel so blessed to have such wonderful friends. They have become an extremely important part of my life, and I know the friendship that we have, is a friendship that will last forever. Thank you Min, and Ape for all the good times, and the support you have given me over the past couple of years.

Min, happy birthday. You finally made it to 18. Enjoy this year. Live it to the fullest. I miss you, and I love you. x x x

I made it!

I made it to Spain! How incredible.

I don't know where, or how to begin... maybe with saying goodbye. I don't know what to say about saying goodbye, except that it was one of the hardest things I've had to do, and I found it incredibly hard to do. I thought I would never stop crying.

I didn't sleep well on the last night I had in Australia. Not because I was sad about leaving, but because I was dreaming about all I had to do. Before I went to sleep I was sad, because I only had one more night to hug Mum and Dad in bed. So I got up, went to their bedroom, had a little cry, hugged and finally went to sleep in my own room. One last time for a year. That morning I repacked all my things, and got rid of so many clothes. (Looking back on it, I'm glad I got rid of all my t-shirts, because there is no way I would be wearing them now... it's way too cold!)

Before long, it was time to go. Oh saying goodbye to Bonnie. How I miss that little cutie. I swear every dog I see (big or small) looks exactly like Bonnie. Mum, Dad, give her a big hug for me!!

And then I was at the airport. We had a coffee at Krispy Kremes, and I thought it was lovely that my best friends April and Min, and Josh came to the airport to farewell me. This is from a journal entry that I wrote on the way to Spain:

Time moved on and I realised, I just wanted to 'rip the bandaid off'. I didn't want to sit around for another half hour pretending I wasn't going. Oh the tears, will they ever disappear?
Saying goodbye to my family has been the hardest thing I've ever done. I love them so much and it pains me so much that I won't be able to share this part of my life with them physically. I miss Dad's warm hugs, and Mum's soothing touch already, and I'm only just past Alice Springs. But like 'Desert song', from Hillsong, "All of my life, in every season, you are still God, I have a reason to sing, I have a reason to worship." in every season, whether it be a hard or joyous season, I will always have a reason to praise God. Because he has given me, for now, a wonderful family,mybeautiful friends, and a life full of adventures.
So I take a big breath in; I sigh. I close my eyes and anticipate the year God has in plan for me.

And I have felt incredibly blessed by this opportunity! I have seen so many great things in this past week. Madrid was so amazing. I feel like I could easily live there for a year.. so many great things to see, and many narrow streets to explore! We got to Madrid, and I was pretty disappointed.. I felt like it was too warm to be Europe! But, when I went out later it was really cold.. well I thought it was cold - around 9 degrees... but from summer it was. At the airport I had my first translation fun. We were at customs, and we weren't sure what we had to declare, and Vic (another exchanger) had a shep's skin. So she said, "sheep skin" and the customs guy was like.... "no understand" So I said, "piel (skin) de...." I couldn't think of the word for sheep (ovejas) so just said, "Baaaaa" He understood then!

The people of JYC are very nice. We were met by Maria Carmen, who told us about the city on our way to our hotel in the centre of Madrid. When we arrived at the hotel, we met Emerito, the old man in charge of JYC. He is the loveliest man ever, and the cutest one too! After lunch, we had a shower, and cleaned up, and then Olga, another JYC representative took us around Madrid at about 3pm. Madrid is just beautiful. It is full of old, history filled buildings, and has such a lively unique characteristic. In all the different plazas, there were different people playing music, which added to the mood. By the time it got to 3:45, the jetlag had set in, and I began to resent having come out. I felt like if someone so much as smiled at me, I'd cry. We stayed out till 7:30, and I felt like I'd conquered the world, I was so tired. We went and saw all of the sites... The Retiro (the most beautiful garden!), La Puerta de Alcala (also very stunning!) The picture to the left is of the lake thing that's in the Retiro. There were a lot of boats out there, and apparently, lots of people go out there (especially couples) for an hour at a time. It looked like so much fun. After we got back from our walk (trek in my eyes!), we had dinner, una bocadilla de tortilla. A Spanish omelette on a roll. The bread in Spain is really nice. I have yet to see a loaf of bread. People just eat like baguette type bread, and it is so delicious!

I was meant to catch a 3pm bus the next day to Tudela. Emerito drove me to the bus stop (I don't know if I'd call it driving though. He was driving around 90km in a 30km zone, barely looking at the road. I have noticed that road rules aren't taken into account when people are driving. Here in Spain, give way signs at roundabouts are just a recommendation. Cars stop in the middle of roundabouts to let other cars through, or just stop randomly. Cars cut other cars off, and no one seems to care. Cars stop in the middle of the road, people get out of the car, get back in, leave, creating an enormous amount of traffic, and no one seems to care. I'm glad that I'm not allowed to drive while I'm over here... I don't think I'd want to!!) Emerito is lovely. He told me that "You have to open the door to your heart and your mind, if you don't you will learn nothing while you are in Spain". I believe that he's right. I'm going to make sure that my time here is a time where I will learn a crazy amount of things... Spanish, the Spanish culture, and maybe even some Latin and Maths! Exchange is a year where everything we've known will change and with that will come a new world view and characteristics. I'm looking forward to learning. So, I have opened the door to my heart and mind, willing to be challenged.

Emerito, of course, being the old, funny Spaniard he is, got the times wrong, so I of course, missed the bus. "No problema". I ended up eating a second lunch (my first lunch being another bocadilla de tortilla) at Maria Carmen's parents' house. It was an interesting experience. They knew no English, spoke rapid Spanish. To say I was a little overwhelmed is an understatement. I got really tired from trying to understand everything, so I had a 'siesta' after I ate. I caught the bus to Tudela, and got more and more excited by the minute.

At about midnight, I finally arrived at Tudela. I saw María Antonia, y José Antonio waiting for me at the bus stop, and they are so lovely. There is a definite difference in temperature between Madrid and Tudela... Tudela is much colder. I got to skype Mum and Dad that night, which was so so so lovely.

On Monday I started school. I was pretty nervous. But, there is another Australian in my class, which is both a blessing and not. The blessing is that she is able to show me the ropes, and explain everything to me in a way that I'll understand. The downside is that we speak English together. I was expecting to get to school, and have to really use my Spanish, but on my first day, I barely used any Spanish. That got me really down. My whole aim for exchange, is to become fluent in Spanish. And there I was at school, speaking English to an Australian. Exchange is certainly different to how I expected it to be. I was really surprised by the ease I felt in slipping back into school. I thought it would take me a week or two, but I felt completely natural in a class where I didn't understand anything. It felt like I was back in Tonga, or Hong Kong, and I felt... comfortable. The school that I go to is pretty big. It's a lot smaller than Wycliffe, but has 13oo people that attend. It's three stories high, and reminds me so much of American schools. Long hallways, a cafeteria type thing... Though is probably completely different. They don't take attendance here, so you could not turn up, and no one would do anything about it. And they do exams all the time! On Monday they had an exam, tomorrow, they have two... every week they have an exam for a subject, so it's constantly study study study for them. It's a completely different education system, and I'm loving working it out.

Today is Thursday, and I'm in a completely different mindset to my first day. I changed out of Economics to Latin, and have moved seats, and am sitting next to some Spanish people. I'm actually loving going to school, and trying to work out what people are saying. And, to make things even better... It snowed today!! It snowed all day. At first it was just like sprinkles of snow here and there, but by the end of the day it was steady, and was staying on the ground. But, then for about half an hour the sun came out and melted most of it away.


This weekend is Carnaval.. I think the equivalent to America's Halloween, but, bigger! We all dress up, and go out to town. And this Sunday I'm going skiing in France! It's really close to the Spanish border... but still in France. I'm really excited.

I miss my family. And my friends. But in an unusual way. I am happy to be in Spain. I love that I am here for a year, and that I get to experience life as a Spaniard. But I see my family and friends in everything. Everyone reminds me of someone at home. Mum, you would love María Antonia. She puts so much butter on bread! That reminds me of you. In my home, there is a model plane, and everytime I walk past it, I think of you, Dad, and wonder what you're up to. Any dog I see, reminds me of Bonnie. Everything brings memories of home, and the only thing I'm sad about, is that you guys don't get to experience this journey with me physically.

Exchange is completely different to how I thought it would be. I thought it would be a lot easier, or fun, or crazy. But it's not. It's difficult. Leaving everything for a year is incredibly difficult, and I've had a lot of times in just one week, where I question what I am doing in Spain. Being somewhere where I can't express myself is difficult and so frustrating. But with the hardness, has come great triumph. I have been praying more constantly, continually thanking God for the small things, like snow at school today, or asking for help when I call my ears (orejas) sheep (ovejas). I started a prayer journal type thing when I left. And looking back just a week, I can see how God has been answering my prayers. I love that God is a constant through exchange. He is always there, when everything that I hold dear to me is not. This week I have learnt a lot about the God of comfort, the God of wisdom, the God that answers prayers. He is a God worth praising, and I'm looking forward to being revealed of all of His glory this year.